yo ppl...haha..i'm back...haf not been updating for the past few days..hmm....really getting absent minded...dun even remember wat i did on sunday..lol...but monday went to zhenghua sec to look ard the air unit there...it was not so gd...swiss is juz abit better in term of strength...haha...victor was really like king there...then went to unity sec to look ard too...it was veri gd..alot better than swiss...i'm so jealous..lol..anyway had lunch wif angie,yasmeen,victor n two unity cadet..then went home..then todae slept whole day then went orchard to meet mi princess they all...went shopping...mi princess bought mi a t shirt...it is quite nice...lol...but dunno y juz feel tt something is missing between the two of us...something i juz could not describe..haiz...anyway had a gd time wif them...n todae i'm gonna ECP later in the morning...haha...gonna learn how to blade..until then cya guys again...n happy new year

yoyo..juz got back frm mi bro's house..lol...went play need for speed underground...wee o wee..it was so shiok...the car all so nice...but too bad it is onli in the game...sg wanna own such car onli if u filthy rich but also no use...no place to race..haha..went to ncc trg todae..it was so fun wif angie n yasmeen there...really crap alot wif them..haha..hey princess...juz wanna tell u dun feel sorri coz i dun blame u at all...i'm alright le...juz wish u all the best k? no matter wat u r still mi princess...haha =P

yo..went xmas countdown last nite...had not a bad time...was quite fun lor c lots of ppl playing their hearts out...haha...went out wif mi bro n sis...lol...thanx alot guys for going out wif mi during xmas...but pls do not ask mi if i'm alright again..u guy noe wat i mean...i will always say i'm alright...u wun b able to hear mi say i'm not alright bcoz i would nv do tt...so wat if i'm not alright?...can thingh bcome alright for mi when i admit tt i'm not?...no it wun...but i'm really glad to noe tt u all care:)...dun worry my frens...i will b alright as time past coz time can heal all thing...i'll b alright...believe mi :)

hey...i'm feeling alot better todae..at least till now...thanx to my frens who chatted wif mi last nite...glad to noe there ur were there for mi...mayb ur r the angels tt i was wishing for...hmm..yes...ur were rite...i not not having a gd time..she isn't having a nice one either...so i should mi more understanding instead of being a spoilt brat tt i was yesterday...i was too inmatured this few days...haha...hopw tt this xmas i will enjoy miself...hope it will b different frm all other xmas...i've a feeling this will a b a special one...

wat the fuck is this...when i try to stand up something will juz want to bring mi down...shit man...fucking hell...say wanna go fren house for xmas n torn also get so much scolding n nagging...ya rite...mother are always rite...fuck off man...i dun take this...wat the fuck reason is this....y muz thing try to bring mi down when i try to stand up?...y u dun praise mi when i get Bs n Cs for mi exams...when i say i get Ds n Cs u say y u get Cs n Ds...y cannot get As or at least Bs.....now i get all Bs n one C u say y no A? wat the fuck is this...yes u did bring mi up...but does it mean u haf total control over mi?...can u pls b more reasonable...i really start to hate this place again...this is no home...this is juz a house wif walls...oh...now i did not regret signing the army...at least i m not financally dependent on u if not i dunno wat the hell is gonna happen to mi...pls god..if there is any...pls help mi...where r the angel or watever u call them...ppl tell mi tt life sux..but they still push on bcoz of hope..but i dun c any hope...wat is there to hope for? Love? not really important to mi now...coz i m starting to wonder whether it exist...how i wish there is someone...someone who understand mi...i really can't take it anymore...i dunno how long more cani hold on...i'm laughing or smiling on the outside but in fact i'm crying on the inside...i hate trying to b happy...but this is life...no matter how unhappy u r u hafta look happy...y do ppl haf to so pretentious?...y look happy when u r not?...the world is so fake..ppl are so fake...y do we hafta fake other n fake ourselves?...oh y?

hey my bro was rite...when u smile or laugh..it does not means tt u r happy..i've been trying to do the rite thing...now the thing happen as they should haf been so i should not b sad rite?...haha.. now i noe i'm alright...mayb last few days i've been thinking too much..really too much...i should look at it normally...frm the view point of ordinary fren...haha..tt way i will feel better...yes...i was thinking too much this few days...i feel better now...u stupid boi...dun think too much...some things are juz not meant to b...wat is ur will eventually b urs...but wat not urs will eventually leave u no matter how hard u try to hold on...i muz b strong...how can i let such little thing make mi feel so down...haha...there is still alot of obstacle ahead...this is nothing...as the saying go' hard things are put in our way not to stop us. but to call out our courage and our strength'

y is this world so cruel?...u does the thing u like always avoid u...i really feel so vexed....i m begining to hate myself....y am i so useless...u r so lousy...tt y...now i noe.....

If there is such thing as love..i believe i've lost hope in it...coz love do not exist...if it does...it seems to b avoid mi....i really really hate love

hmm...it's all over...believe mi...so i was rite..it's over :'(

i dunno whether i'm thinkinh too much...i really can't understand wat she is thinking now...mayb i thought too much this early morning...but it is really confusing wat she is trying to do...mayb i should try n look at it normally...really hope tt everything will turn out fine...Is there really such a LeaF? It's too foggy...i can't c clearly...

hi ppl...surprised y i m updating so early in the morning?...haha...it's bcoz i juz found out tt she made a decision...a decision tt i was hoping tt she would not make...but well she did in the end...hey princess...i really dun blame u for this decision u made...really...actually i should not haf started it rite frm the start...it was a mistake rite frm the start...juz wanna wish u all the best n let u noe tt all i've say to u is true...frm the start till now...think the song 'fool again' can describe how i feel rite now...althought we've not really started..but u occupied tt special place in my heart tt no other gals ever did b4...Leaf's departure is because of Wind's pursuit. Or because Tree didn't ask her to stay?...There wasn't such a leaf at all....

hi ppl...haven not been updating this few days coz have been staying at home except yesterday...went to ncc meeting at afs...there was really a huge turnout...this is the first time tt we did not haf enough chairs to sit at the meeting...haha...but was really disappointed at the top level management...which is the officers level...well...the com air went of the n the incoming one really cannot make it..haha...mayb i should give him a chance b4 commenting...but...well first impression always count rite?...really dunno wat is going to happen to ncc...not juz air element..really disappointed...but nvm la...think everything will turn out fine..rite? haha...went to suntec after tt in a really big grp...meet up wif other 46th instructors n cadet frm other syn too...but went of at 9.30...had dinner there n tok rot there...sent her home...actually not home..onli to amk...after tt her bf was there to send her home...really wondering if i m doing the rite thing...ppl wat do ur think i should do?...i'm really lost rite now....

hi ppl...can someone gif mi some advice?...wat should u do if u like a gal who is attached?...i m really falling for her this time...really can't get her outta my mind...omg...wat should i do?...i know i should not haf like her in the first place...but now...i think i m really too deep in it...it is like i should not like her but i also can't stop myself frm liking her...how i wish i noe wat to do...can someone out there help mi? pls....

hi ppl....juz got back frm australia yesterday morning...it is a great trip..except tt the phone call is ex n the food there is veri ex...haha...when to pearce airbase to see how the 130 SQN is like...visited the orange farm...chocolate factory...wildlife park...hmm...can't remember le...haha...but it was a great trip over all...last but not least...i got to drive a skyline..haha...yes a nissan skyline...well onli in gear 1 though coz it was mi first time touching a steering wheel...haha...but not bad la...dun think i could touch another skyline till 10 more year to come ba...haha...went out wif some of the s5 clts todae...had a great time...but did something veri dumb...dun think i will ever forgive miself for it...haiz...anyway y is it so difficult to love a gal....

juz back home from a sending off dinner with the cadets trainees from syndicate 5...there were 17 of them in all out of 34 if i m not wrong...really enjoyed myself...really touched by wat they did...hope tt they all will pass out as clts...went to kranji battle site, bukit chandu and labadour park this moring with them...learned about the fall of singapore...it is really interesting....hope tt someone will accompany mi to safti library to borrow some books on military when i m free..lol...

hey yo...have not been updating my blog recently...coz went to CLT course as a instructor...lol...go there to help out at the same time kill time...well...see the new clts to be...really feel tt some of them are really not up to standard...lol...mayb i was one of them when i was in clt course...anyway my sydicate wrote comment about mi...n they say tt i m veri quiet...well..think tt is true coz i dun tok as i m not the type who can tok crap n gif ppl inspiration...lol...think i muz really start to learn to tok crap...went to the discovery centre todae...explored the whole centre todae..think i wun b going there for the next few month coz it is really boring...anyway found out mi result todae...got all Bs n one C....haha...not bad not bad...no Ds this sem....hope it stay this way or get better...wun b updating mi blog next week coz i will b going to Australia...lol...time to relax...hope tt the teacher officers escorting us will gif us more slack...coz it wun b fun having them following us or keeping us in the hotel all the time...gotta go send mi phone for repair le....stupid phone keep spoiling...